May 31, 2017
Outgrowing Does NOT Equate With Failure
Maybe you set a course for your marriage long before you exchanged vows. Then one day you’re reflecting on the difficult times you and your spouse have been experiencing recently and you realize the ways in which you communicate have changed. At one time, you used to sit down every night and hash out the details of your day, but all of a sudden there are children and activities and no more nightly conversations. Here is where it’s very important to recognize that you’ve outgrown something that needs to replaced. Communication in any relationship is essential but especially in marriages. Let the past stay there, don’t focus on what can’t be anymore and look for new ways to spend time with your spouse.
If you’re a homeschooling family, that in itself is adventure, but along the way your family size has increased, kids have gotten older, and you find yourself getting “bored” of the same old thing. Homeschooling no longer seems like the fun adventure it used to be when the first kids were little. Stop. Take some time to write down or reflect on why you started homeschooling to begin with so many years ago. I guarantee that you’ll start to notice that there are just simply things your homeschool has outgrown, that just don’t work anymore for your family. That’s perfectly fine because again we are changing constantly. With all of that in mind now you can look at what you want for your homeschool going forward. Is it time to switch curriculums or maybe just change up a textbook here and there? Are you “bored” because you need a fresh space to school in or a new fun gadget to making teaching easier or more fun? Maybe there’s a personality (or two) that would benefit from more time with you or even away from you? No matter how you answer those questions, remember that your homeschool is what you make of it and recognize that not all change is bad.
I’m not certain what your home life looks like, but I can guarantee mine is a whole bunch of joyful chaos. Within that chaos are some good things and some not so good things. Maybe you’ve experienced what we have here – a day or a week where everyone seems off and the house seems exceptionally messy and the chaos is more than everyone can handle!? Well, if you haven’t, praise be, but if you have then you know that those times usually point toward the need for prayerful reflection on how to get back on track. Since I feel like an expert at these “derailings” I can say with confidence that I usually find that we’ve outgrown (even if just temporarily) our current routine. So these are the times when we might change up chores, meals, seats in the van, night time buddies, etc. Pick the area or areas that a little change might spice up your home life again. Don’t be afraid to try something completely out of the ordinary! It will either be a big hit or big flop, but either way, you haven’t committed your life to it so no worries.
So yes indeed even adults can outgrow something! The biggest challenge for us, though, is realizing and accepting that it’s okay. We aren’t failures, we haven’t permanently scarred anyone if something doesn’t work. Reflect, pray, and make a change. It could be fun!