Outgrowing Does NOT Equate With Failure

Children outgrow clothes and baby talk.  Teenagers outgrow (hopefully) bad attitudes and self-centered choices. Young adults outgrow late night parties and frivolous spending.  So what’s left for adults to outgrow? Aren’t we supposed to make sound choices the first time and establish lifelong habits?  Yes, of course we are, however we’re human and there really are things we can outgrow.
Maybe you set a course for your marriage long before you exchanged vows.  Then one day you’re reflecting on the difficult times you and your spouse have been experiencing recently and you realize  the ways in which you communicate have changed.  At one time, you used to sit down every night and hash out the details of your day, but all of a sudden there are children and activities and no more nightly conversations.  Here is where it’s very important to recognize that you’ve outgrown something that needs to replaced.  Communication in any relationship is essential but especially in marriages.  Let the past stay there, don’t focus on what can’t be anymore and look for new ways to spend time with your spouse.  

If you’re a homeschooling family, that in itself is adventure, but along the way your family size has increased, kids have gotten older, and you find yourself getting “bored” of the same old thing.  Homeschooling no longer seems like the fun adventure it used to be when the first kids were little.  Stop. Take some time to write down or reflect on why you started homeschooling to begin with so many years ago.  I guarantee that you’ll start to notice that there are just simply things your homeschool has outgrown, that just don’t work anymore for your family.  That’s perfectly fine because again we are changing constantly.  With all of that in mind now you can look at what you want for your homeschool going forward.  Is it time to switch curriculums or maybe just change up a textbook here and there?  Are you “bored” because you need a fresh space to school in or a new fun gadget to making teaching easier or more fun?  Maybe there’s a personality (or two) that would benefit from more time with you or even away from you?  No matter how you answer those questions, remember that your homeschool is what you make of it and recognize that not all change is bad.

I’m not certain what your home life looks like, but I can guarantee mine is a whole bunch of joyful chaos.  Within that chaos are some good things and some not so good things.  Maybe you’ve experienced what we have here – a day or a week where everyone seems off and the house seems exceptionally messy and the chaos is more than everyone can handle!?  Well, if you haven’t, praise be, but if you have then you know that those times usually point toward the need for prayerful reflection on how to get back on track.  Since I feel like an expert at these “derailings” I can say with confidence that I usually find that we’ve outgrown (even if just temporarily) our current routine.  So these are the times when we might change up chores, meals, seats in the van, night time buddies, etc.  Pick the area or areas that a little change might spice up your home life again.  Don’t be afraid to try something completely out of the ordinary!  It will either be a big hit or big flop, but either way, you haven’t committed your life to it so no worries.

So yes indeed even adults can outgrow something!  The biggest challenge for us, though, is realizing and accepting that it’s okay.  We aren’t failures, we haven’t permanently scarred anyone if something doesn’t work.  Reflect, pray, and make a change.  It could be fun!

Stay Strong, Moms!!

We can do it !  

No matter if you homeschool or send kids to school, this time of year can be rough.

The finish line is in sight, so keep up the hard work!!

Friday Feasting: Orange-Vanilla Monkey Bread

**photo credit here**

"The recipe I'm sharing today would make a great addition to your Easter planning menu.  It's a perfect crowd pleaser with it's zesty sweetness.  My oldest daughter tracked the recipe down after watching the Pioneer Woman make it on television.  I assure you it's delicious.  We even adjusted the sweetness factor down a bit and found it just perfect for our many tastebuds!"

Prep: 10 minutes
Cook: 25 Minutes
Serves: 12

INGREDIENTS

-3 cans Buttermilk Biscuits, not the flaky kind; cold
-1 cup sugar
-2 whole oranges, zested
-1 dash salt
-2 sticks salted butter
-3/4 brown sugar
-1 tbsp vanilla extract

DIRECTIONS

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.

Make sure all biscuit cans are very cold. Open all the cans and cut biscuits into quarters.  Fill a large Ziploc bag with the granulated sugar, orange zest, and salt.  Seal the bake and shake it around until contents are well mixed.  Add the biscuit pieces to the bag, seal, and shake the bag.  Be sure all the biscuit pieces are well coated with orange sugar.  Pour the pieces into a bundt (my preference) or tube pan and set it aside.

In a medium sauce pan, melt the butter over medium heat and then stir in the brown sugar and vanilla until just barely combined.  Pour mixture over all the biscuit pieces, scraping the pan to get all the yummy butter and brown sugar pieces!  Let the whole thing settle for just a minute then place in the oven.

Bake for 25 minutes or until top of the biscuits are golden brown.  Remove the pan from the oven and set it on a rack to cool for at least 10 minutes. Then turn the pan over onto a cake plate.

Serve and enjoy!

A Perpetual Yes

It might seem that the expectations on us as mothers are never-ending...right?!?!  Between the ordinary, daily activities like laundry, dishes, cooking, etc. and the extraordinary pulls on our time including transporting kids to activities, Church committees, visits with friends in need, don't you feel the pressure to get it all done and to do it well?  Maybe I'm alone, but somehow I doubt it, somehow I just know that you feel overwhelmed and under appreciated just as much as me.

The irony is that we put the expectations on ourselves.  We are the ones placing so much pressure on our daily to-do lists. We spend our days and nights emphasizing productivity over living and we're surviving instead of thriving!  But the One who created us, loves us, and knows exactly what we need to do every day to spend eternity with Him in Heaven...all He asks of us is to say yes to His will for our lives.

We put more pressure on ourselves than God!  It's not that He doesn't have high expectations….to whom much is given much is expected...but He only asks us to do or accomplish what we are able to within the time He's given us.  I'm fairly certain God doesn't expect you and I to run full speed from 6am when our feet touch the floor to 11pm when we finally lay our heads back down!!!  However, more and more that's what I'm doing and many of my friends find themselves doing.
 
When we say yes to what God has planned and we do it daily I just know that our daily lives will look and feel differently.  Asking Him to help us be present in the moments He gives us makes such a difference.  I know because I've prayed that prayer. I've asked Him to make me present to my kids, for example, and to not miss special moments with them and He's delivered well beyond my expectations.  He's helped me to focus on the people in my life, building the relationships, not constantly issuing commands and dictating school lessons.

Our goal should just be to keep saying yes, it should be our perpetual response to whatever God asks of us, whether it's going to be easy or difficult.  That simple yes, our willingness to do as He asks, is our path to Heaven.

Friday Feasting: Easy Black Bean Chili

**photo credit can be found HERE**

Easy Black Bean Chili
(Found on vegetariantimes.com)

*Serves 4-6

Ingredients:
2 15oz cans of black beans, drained and rinsed
1 16oz jar of salsa
1 bunch scallions chopped (or half onion)
1 10oz pkg. Frozen corn (or 1 can)
1/3 cup chopped cilantro
salt to taste

1. Combine beans, salsa, and scallions in saucepan.  Cover and cook over medium heat, stirring occasionally for 10 minutes.
2. Stir in corn, cilantro and salt to taste, and cook, stirring occasionally until heated through. Serve hot.


**This recipe is super simple and more than delicious.  For our family I always at least double the recipe.  We eat it as soup with crushed tortilla chips, sour cream, and shredded cheese on top.  We've also used it as dip with tortilla chips.  I often serve it with cheese quesadillas, too.

A Clean Slate

This time of year is ripe with newness.  We just started a brand new calendar year.  It's like a freshly fallen snow or a clean black board.  Many of us have probably made New Year's resolutions or set goals that we want to achieve for 2017.  If you haven't had time or decided to write off any sort of change this year, don't ever think it's too late to change your mind.

Last year I took the advice of speaker I heard who suggested picking one word for 2016, something representative of what I need to work on in my spiritual/personal life.  So I chose the word content.  In the midst of a fast paced world, among friends who do this or have this and seem very happy, I knew that I was struggling with being happy where I was and with who I was at the time.  I'm so grateful that I decided to focus on being content – any time I found myself struggling I said a quick prayer for help.  I truly feel like I grew in the virtue of contentment.

This year I've chosen part of my favorite scripture passage to guide me through 2017.  Maybe you have a favorite Scripture verse or bit of sage wisdom that inspires you.  Or maybe there's a Saint who pushes you to be the best version of yourself.  Whatever or whoever it is, let it guide you through the ups and downs of 2017.  When life starts to suffocate you and responsibilities are piling up, stop and reflect on that tidbit or Saint, say a prayer for help.  I assure you that you won't go unaided.

O Holy Night

Do you ever feel weary, like the weight of the world is crushing down upon you? Do you find the weight of your personal “crosses” seemingly unbearable? I do.

It seems like more often than not lately that I feel weary.  I feel like there's just no more of me left to share or to give.  That feeling in itself is draining.  There are days when I've been so overcome by what lays before me that tears stream down my cheeks.
 
Early mornings and late nights. Endless loads of laundry. Piles of papers to sort through and file away. Bits and pieces of random stuff just everywhere. A spouse that deserves my attention but always gets the dregs at the end of the day.

Surely I'm not alone.  What mother or father hasn't felt that overwhelming sense of weariness?  It's completely human to feel weak, because we are.  We weren't made to go on and on, doing and going, and never resting.  We weren't made to carry our burdens alone.  God sent His perfect Son into the world to make our burden light.

I was listening to my favorite Christmas hymn, O Holy Night, the other day when for the first time I actually heard the words  Here's the line that God wanted me to hear, “A thrill of hope the weary world rejoices for yonder breaks a new and glorious morn.”  I'm weary, you're weary but on the night of our dear Savior's birth, in that moment when Heaven meets Earth, it's all wiped away. A sweet, holy baby, so small and innocent, swaddled and laid in a manger, embraces our weariness, our burdens, and we rejoice with the angel choirs.

We can believe in the power of His love that makes all things new.  We can celebrate all that His life has done for us.  Jesus Christ, our Savior, our King has come to Earth to make all things new. He restores us, renews our faith, and gives us the hope of Heaven.  Merry Christmas!

Friday Feasting: “Not My Family's” Spiced Cider

"This warm, delicious holiday drink is a perfect addition to any celebration this time of year.  Not only does it taste super yummy it also smells wonderful!  Enjoy." 

“Not My Family's” Spiced Cider 

Ingredients
-1/2 gallon apple juice
-1 cup cranberry juice
-1 cloved orange or tangerine
-3 cinnamon sticks Sprinkle ground cinnamon, too
-1/2 cup sugar

Directions
1.  Place all ingredients into crock pot.
2.  Heat on high until bubbling, then reduce to low.

Read To Me Monday: The Last Straw

We got out our Advent/Christmas books this weekend which is always super exciting around here!  I wanted to share one of our (my) favorites that we've read so many times the pages fell out everywhere when I picked it up.

The Last Straw by Fredrick H. Thury, is a fantastic story for all ages.  Kids love the unusual name of the camel, Hoshmakaka, and the colorful illustrations of his journey.  Adults can relate to his weariness, his weakness, his feelings of inadequacy as he tries to please others and do it all.  Everyone can benefit from the lesson, which is twofold, one the reminder that Jesus never asks us to do anything alone but to let him help us carry our burdens and two, that when we aim to serve Him, to show Him honor, all things seem easier.

I hope you decide to check this book out of your local library or borrow a copy from a friend.  It's a great read!

Called to Be Nothing Less than Saints

I love homilies that ignite a fire in my spiritual life. Just recently, my pastor delivered a message that stirred me enough to recall his words over and over again. The simple but profound take home point is this, “We are called to be nothing less than Saints.” 

After he said that, I think time stopped just for me. I was stuck a tunnel of “oh my goodness” as the weight of those words really sunk in. On one hand, I've always known that our goal is to know, love, and serve God and to be happy with Him forever in Heaven, yet for some reason the whole “nothing less” part really stopped me in my mental tracks. 

Of course we want to get to Heaven as God the Father desires for us from all eternity. However, He wants more for us then just to make it to Heaven – to cross the finish line just barely if you know what I mean. I picture a runner, somewhat like myself, who finishes a race, wipes the brow of their forehead and says, “Phew, I made it.” A sort of, wow that was close kind of moment. That's NOT what God wants for us. Don't get me wrong, an entrance into Heaven is an entrance into Heaven, but why procrastinate, why put off getting closer to Heaven now? 

We're daughters, wives, moms, friends, and in all those roles God is calling us to become the Saint He intends us to become. More often than not, the Saints we read about lived ordinary lives just like us, but always in an extraordinary way. That's what our focus needs to be. God doesn't expect us all to convert entire nations, fight in wars, or travel thousands of miles preaching His Gospel. We need to be Saints in the making right where we are – in our marriages, our families, our Churches, our communities. 

The endless loads of laundry, sleepless nights, pots and pots of homemade soup, hours driving kids around to activities, late night talks with angst ridden teenagers – these are the moments where we become nothing less than the Saints we are called to be for God's Kingdom. 

Friday Feasting: Plain (but amazing) Muffins

Photo Credit goes to ... http://drashburn.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/flax-muffins2.jpg

I want to share this recipe today because it's simple but yummy. We are headed into cooler weather (I think) and with that comes the desire for comfort foods like homemade soups and baked goods. One of our favorite snacks or breakfasts, especially during the colder months is muffins. There are more than a gazillion muffin recipes out there and we probably have tried many of them and even liked most of them, but there's one that we always come back to from The Hillbilly Housewife. It's a very simple plain muffin recipe that you can turn into any sort of deliciousness that you want. We've made it into a savory side for dinner, a simple snack muffin with cinnamon sugar on top, or added things like craisins, raisins, dried apples, etc. 

I hope you enjoy it as much as we do! 

PLAIN (but amazing) MUFFINS 

Oven Temp: 400 degrees + Prep time: 15 min + Cook time: 15-20 min

Yield: about 2 dozen muffins 

Ingredients: 
½ cup oil 
2 medium eggs 
2 cups milk 
¾ cup sugar 
1 tsp salt 
2 tbsp baking powder 
4 cups flour 

Directions: 
In a large bowl combine the oil, egg, milk, sugar, and salt. Mix it very well with a fork or wire whisk. Measure in the baking powder and flour. Mix again until all of the dough particles are moistened. Do not over mix. The whole thing should take about 20-30 strokes. Spoon the batter into a dozen well greased muffin cups. Bake at 400 degrees for 15-20 minutes. Remove from the oven and cool slightly before removing from the pan. Eat and enjoy! 

Variations: 
Whole Wheat Muffins 
Cornmeal Muffins 
Cinnamon Raisin Muffins 
Garlic Cheesy Muffins 
Pumpkin Spice Muffins 
Corn Muffins 
Breakfast Meat Muffins

My Favorite Time of the Year

No matter what is going on around us.  No matter how the world or our country spins their agenda, God is still in control.  And when we can't see Him.  When we feel like He's far away or maybe that He doesn't hear us, He gives us just what we need.

Right now, autumn is just what I needed.  The crispness of the air, the beautiful splash of colors, the tartness of a fresh picked apple, and the knowledge that He gives all of those things for my joy – how lovely.

Thank you, Jesus.

Anyone else ever feel this way?

To be honest and fair, it should really say “my children”, but the point is the same.  Does anyone else deal with this same problem?  We definitely expect the kids to keep their rooms and school areas picked up, but for some reason their idea of cleaned up and ours is not quite the same.  Then what would take me, maybe 15 minutes to straighten, ends up turning into a saga that leaves me looking like Mr. Bones in that picture!!!

Change Is Absolutely OK

One of my favorite lines from a television show is this, “If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always got.” True statement.  Absolutely cuts to the heart of meeting change head on. I use that line all the time with other people, with my family, and with myself.

It's so easy to get stuck in a rut. This is especially true for me and really I think for any mom.  We find something that works, be it a morning routine, a homeschooling curriculum, a carpool route, or a meal plan. We put those things into practice and they work for us.  Then all of a sudden a new baby comes along, the math book gets too difficult, dad's work schedule changes, or a food allergy enters the scene.  AAAHHH!  What do we do now?

Sometimes change finds us and it really causes an uproar.  We find ourselves unsettled and confused about how to move forward.  We can't see the forest for the trees because it wasn't in our plan. If you're like me, I start mentally processing the long term effects of the change and I easily find myself overwhelmed. Even small changes can do this to me because I've put too much weight in my plan. (Spontaneity is not my strong suit!) However, when things finally settle back down and the “change” has become the new normal, life seems good again.  It's interesting how embracing what might be a little unsettling can actually help us to grow, to move forward in a positive way.  I think of this as God stretching me, asking me to step out of my comfort zone!

On the other hand, sometimes we need to seek out change, to search for that new normal that will point us in the right direction.  These occasions are best identified by that unsettled feeling or maybe a sense of disorder (beyond the usual!).  I've found in my own life and in my vocation as wife and mother that there are sometimes very obvious signs that something needs to change and other times when the signs are more subtle.  In either case, we must seek out the change best suited to our needs, to the needs of our family or to that particular situation.

Change is absolutely OK.  We need to be stirred to a new level of awareness.  We need to take courage and step out of our comfort zones.  God is still with us no matter what.  He doesn't abandon us just because we choose to shop at Aldi instead of Meijer, or because we choose to send one kid to school and homeschool the others, or because we decide to say no more often to cut down on the craziness of our schedules.  The list is endless but He's in the midst of those decisions and those changes when we allow Him to be.  Change can bring out the worst in all of us because we approach it with fear and trepidation. If we instead approach it with joy and acceptance (to the best of our ability and through prayer) then we will ultimately find the blessing in all change.

Monday Meme: Humility

Just what you say right before God brings you to your knees.  I know from experience that about the time I think I have everything under control, or that my will is in line with His will, that's about the same time I get practice in the virtue of humility!  For me, that lesson is a constant necessity and a fantastic reminder that He's in charge, that He knows best, and He's always got my back.

Monday Meme: Mom Vacation

This is so true!  There are just days (most) where I need a break from the noise, the chaos, the craziness...even when it's all good.  Ten people, eight under the age of 13 makes for a household that is only (truly) quiet for like 6 hours a day.  So don't feel like you're weird for finding enjoyment in grocery shopping alone or rejoicing when you get to go to the bathroom alone – I'm right there with you momma!!

Open the Eyes of My Heart

It seems like lately I have not been able to focus or even recognize the joy and beauty in parenting my oldest, sweet daughter.  Please don't take that as a knock on parenting or on my child. As anything in life, there's ebb and flow.  Sometimes I feel like I've got a handle on the situation and sometimes I don't. Well, this weekend God blessed me with perspective and I will be forever grateful for that moment.

Grace shines when she's on stage and loves to sing her sweet heart out.  God has blessed her with a lovely voice and I get such a kick out of hearing her sing (just like her daddy). This past weekend, she starred as Serena Katz in Fame, Jr. for the park district summer theater program. I've watched her on stage in four other shows this past 18 months and enjoyed every last one of them. However, this time it was like I had new glasses on.

There she was, center stage, singing and dancing beautifully. I wasn't looking at Serena Katz, really, I was looking at my sweet little girl growing into a beautiful young lady. Oh did I cry. The tears just welled up and fell down my smiling momma cheeks.  Right in front of my eyes, my oldest child was growing up.  Wow!  Where did the time go?  How did this happen?  It was like God was giving me a fresh perspective, a reminder that His work in her isn't done, but that so far she's pretty amazing. 

I needed that moment.  I needed to see Grace right where she belongs using the gifts that God has given her to recognize that she is indeed growing up into her own person. All of a sudden, I realized that parenting this lovely young lady doesn't have to be like what the world says about raising tweens and teens.  I know there will still be ebb and flow.  We're going to argue and disagree, but I know that I can't make her into something she's not.  There will be good days and bad days for both of us.

For so long, I've been focused on the tough stuff, the bad days, the arguments all the while my sweet girl has been growing up into a young lady.  I don't want to focus on the tough stuff anymore.  I want to focus on all the amazing things that make my sweet Grace who she is and who she will become.

 Maybe you've been having some tough days mothering a particular child or children, that's okay. For just one moment, though, stop and ask God to give you eyes to see what you've been missing. Ask our Heavenly Father to bless you with a moment of joy that gives you new perspective.  I promise He will deliver!

Monday Meme: The Need to be More Like Mary

Yesterday's Gospel always gets under my skin, but I'm glad that it does. Every time I hear the story of Mary and Martha, it seems as though the timing is perfect. I'm usually in need of a reminder that I can actually be a better wife, a better mom, a better friend if I spend time with Jesus first. The grace that Jesus gives us through the sacraments is by far more life-giving than an extra 5 minutes straightening the living room or putting toys away. Neither of those tasks is intrinsically bad, but Jesus is reminding us that we need to prioritize. Boy oh boy, do I need that reminder sometimes!

Friday Feasting: Enchilada Casserole

(photo credit HERE)

"This recipe is a super delicious Mexican casserole that can work for any night of the week. We've
thrown it together with substitutes on the color of peppers, the type of beans, and the kind of tortillas.
Just to kick it up a notch when serving, we add some shredded taco cheese and a dollup of sour cream!  Enjoy!"

ENCHILADA CASSEROLE
(from http://www.forksoverknives.com/recipes/enchilada-casserole/)

Ingredients:
1 medium yellow onion chopped
1 medium red bell pepper chopped
1 tbsp freshly minced garlic
1 tsp dried oregano
1 tsp dried basil
2 teaspoons chili powder
1 can (15 ounces) diced tomatoes, not drained
1 can (15 ounces) black beans, drained and rinsed
1 medium zucchini, diced
1 cup corn
5 cups roughly chopped kale leaves (we prefer more finely
chopped)
6 corn tortillas (6 inch) cut into 1 inch squares
Guacamole optional

Directions:
1. Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Chop or prepare all ingredients before starting.
2. Heat 1 tbsp of oil and add the onion and bell pepper and saute for 5 minutes.
3. Reduce the heat to medium, add the garlic, oregano, basil and chili powder, and saute for 1-2
minutes more, adding water as needed to keep things moving.
4. Stir in diced tomatoes, beans, zucchini, corn, kale, and 4 of the cut up tortillas, cover and cook for 5 minutes more, stirring halfway through.
5. After the 5 minutes, place 1 cup of this mixture into a blender and blend until smooth then add back
into pot and stir sauce all back together. (We skip this step and just immersion blend in the 9x13 dish)
Spoon mixture into 9x13 dish.
6. Scatter remaining tortilla pieces across the top and bake uncovered for 15 minutes. Remove and let
stand for 5 minutes before serving.
7. Top with your choice of fun things like cheese, sour cream, guacamole, crushed tortilla chips. Serve
and enjoy!

Monday Meme: Isn't this the truth?

Mondays are historically just rough days. I think this is complicated when our weekends are just as crazy as the week days and for our family that's been the case for several weeks in a row. Somewhere, in the future, I'm uncertain when, maybe Monday will feel nice and ordinary...or maybe not. Either way, on we go, one foot in front of the other!